The Reason Why She Can’t Get Married - Chapter 70

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Chapter 70

‘Oh, for goodness sake.’

Crumple. Selena couldn’t help but crush Madison’s letter again.

“Lord Madison, pardon me, but are you in your right mind? What were you thinking when you threatened to tell your mother?”

“What? Oh, that was a joke… I was just teasing, trying to lighten the mood in case Lady Hugo felt pressured by my constant requests.”

‘He calls that a joke?’ Selena was appalled by Madison’s bottomless lack of awareness. He was adding to the pressure, not relieving it!

‘Should I even bother reading more?’ She looked at the mountain of letters with a dreadful expression. She decided to bravely read just one more.

[To Lady Hugo. I heard (audire) you’ve taken up horseback riding as a hobby (hobby). I’ve recently been studying (studium) a foreign language. I try (dico) to speak it once (semel) a day (dies).]

“Ha…” Selena let out a sigh of resignation, dropping the letter onto the table. “Why did you write this letter like this?”

“Ah. I heard Lady Hugo likes intelligent people, so I tried to appeal to her intellect.” Madison replied brightly. Selena was at a loss as to where to even begin fixing this man. This wasn’t simply a matter of learning how to write love letters.

This curse-like lack of social graces… his entire mindset needed an overhaul.

‘Lady Hugo, you must have been through so much.’
The thought of receiving three such letters a day was enough to make Selena wonder why Thalia Hugo hadn’t fled the country. Suddenly feeling a pang of sympathy for her, Selena spoke in a detached voice.

“Lord Madison.”

“Yes, my lady.”

“Let’s release Lady Hugo.” Whatever sins Thalia Hugo had committed, she had surely served her time. She deserved to be free.

“What do you mean…? Where should I release her…?”

“From your affections.” Selena replied gently to the bewildered Madison.

“Uh… are you telling me to give up on Lady Hugo?”

“Yes.” Now understanding, Madison jumped up, exclaiming, “I can’t do that! My feelings for her are genuine!”

“I’m being genuine right now, too.” Selena stared at Madison with a chilling expression. “Give up.”

“Yes, ma’am.” Too afraid to argue further with such a terrifying look, Madison meekly sat back down. Slumping his shoulders, he asked in a pitiful, pleading voice, “Then what am I supposed to do?”

“Lord Madison, your problem isn’t that you can’t write love letters.”

“What? Then what is it…?”

“Listen carefully, even if it hurts. Stop showering every woman with unwanted, fish-food-like compliments. It’s painfully obvious that you’re just desperately trying to win their favor, and it’s frankly repulsive to hear.” The honest and direct advice struck Madison like a bolt of lightning. Her pronunciation was so clear, he couldn’t even pretend he misheard. Already reeling from the shock, Madison stammered, “Th-then what should I…?”

“Do nothing. Just breathe. If a lady passes by, don’t even greet her. If she acknowledges you with a nod, then you may nod back. Always mirror their level of interaction.”

“But…”

“And don’t talk too much. If you want to say ten words, don’t say anything at all. If you want to say twenty words, then say just one. And keep that one word simple and to the point.” As Selena continued, Madison’s face crumpled, on the verge of tears. Meanwhile, his attendant, standing behind him, was silently nodding, clearly agreeing with every word.

“No winking, no biting your lip, no stroking your lip, no jokes, no initiating conversations, no confessions. All forbidden. Understood?”

“No…”

“Do you understand?”

“Yes.”

Overwhelmed, Madison nodded. ‘Right, Selena is the Empire’s most famous dating coach. It’s probably best to listen to her.’

“So, love letters…”

“Ah, sending letters is also forbidden. Only reply when you receive one. And keep it under three lines.”

“B-But, shouldn’t I write three letters, not three lines, to a lady I’m interested in?” Selena smiled brightly at Madison’s indignant protest.

“No, that won’t do. Three lines is too much for you, young master. We’ll reduce it to three words.”

“That can’t be…”

Madison despaired. However, Selena and her attendant believed this was the right decision.

“If you follow everything I’ve said today and still encounter difficulties because of letters, come back. But only if problems arise despite following every single instruction.”

“…Understood.”

Clutching a stack of letters, Madison trudged out of Serenade’s office. Fortunately, he truly adhered to Selena’s advice.

‘Have you noticed how much Young Master Madison has changed lately?’

‘Yes, he’s become much calmer and more dignified.’

‘Honestly, I used to dislike how he pursued every woman he saw, but he seems much better now.’

The shift in society gossip proved it.

‘Good,’ Selena thought, satisfied with his improved reputation. Around that time, Madison once again visited Serenade.