I Picked Up the Trash Others Threw Away - Chapter 33.1

Chapter 33.1

Before I was possessed by the novel, I was born as the second child in an ordinary family.

Like Trish’s older brother, I had an older sister who was competent in all fields, and both my parents and everyone else around us praised and loved her.

As a child, I proudly followed my sister around, but as I grew up, I felt strange every time I was compared to her.

I was just myself. Did I have to resemble my sister just because we were siblings? Did I have to be as capable as her to be recognized?

When I felt that I couldn’t handle the inflated expectations my sister had planted in my parents, I realized that the gap between us was making me feel overwhelmed and exhausted, and I became independent early.

As we became physically distant, my relationship with my family naturally became distant as well. Our weekly calls became monthly, and eventually, once every few months.

A such, I could understand the loneliness and isolation Trish was feeling right now, and why he became like this and started acting out.

“I understand how you feel. But understanding doesn’t mean you shouldn’t reconsider your choices.”

But a painful past didn’t justify present mistakes. He was an adult now, so he should be held accountable for his actions.

As long as they decide to, people can always change and grow.

As I lived my own life after independence, I met new people, became the president of a board game club, and learned the joys of leading meetings. I gradually filled the emptiness in my heart that came from not being loved enough by my parents.

And as I learned to love myself, I started to truly connect with other like-minded people.

“There’s no reason for you to be unhappy in the present just because you were in the past.”

“… I never thought I was unhappy.”

“Maybe not. Because you’ve been acting however you wanted and doing as you pleased until now. But when you first acted against your parents’ expectations, when you deliberately started acting out… were you really happy each time? Was that the life you dreamed of?”

Trish couldn’t answer the question right away.

He opened his mouth a few times, but no words came out. He eventually let out a deep sigh and shook his head slightly, not knowing what to answer.

“Sometimes I felt skeptical. But it was only for a moment.”

His thoughts seemed to deepen. The rhythm of his rowing faltered, and the boat began drifting around slowly.

There were still many things to say before heading back to the pier, so I handed Trish the water in the basket and replied.

“Trish, I can’t force my thoughts on you. Your life is your own, and only you can change it.”

“…”

“But if you feel like you’re living a life you don’t want, it’s not a bad idea to try to change it.”

I deliberately hit my chest with my fist and spoke in a valiant tone, trying to lift Trish’s somber mood.

“Look at me. I didn’t want to marry that old viscount, so I suddenly asked a stranger to marry me. And funnily enough, I pulled it off. My attempt to change my life was successful.”

“That’s an amazing thing. Who would have thought I’d accept the marriage and that we’d be here now, talking face to face like this?”

“If I had stayed quiet in despair, nothing would have changed. This is the result of my struggling to get out of my situation.”

Trish did not respond to the words that followed. He just fidgeted with the glass of water in his hand, neither drinking it nor setting it down.

Recognizing that Trish was hesitating, I placed my hands over his and shared my sincerity.

“So you can do it too. As long as you want to change.”

“… You proposed to me because I’m a bad guy you can use and toss aside after breaking up. If I am rehabilitated and changed, am I still worth using?”

“Well, we already achieved the goal of the contract marriage, right? What comes after that is no problem. On the contrary, if people see you have changed after meeting me, they will believe that we have a strong relationship.”

If I could rehabilitate Trish, it would be good for me.

It would help me gain the trust of Count and Countess Malekiah, and maintain an amicable relationship with an affectionate husband instead of a trashy one would also make my life easier.

I wanted to show others the diverse and new sides of this man, which couldn’t be explained by words like ‘trash’ or ‘scummy ex-boyfriend’.