We’re in a Contract Marriage, But I’ve Imprinted - Chapter 189

After returning to the tower, every time I saw Adella, I felt like I was committing a sin. I knew I had to accept Olivia’s goodwill and treat the pheromone gland, but I couldn’t seem to make up my mind.

Negative thoughts spread quickly, and the guilt I felt not only for Adella but also for Diers grew stronger every day. Though not as much as Adella, Diers had also grown up without his mother’s pheromones for a long time. Would he be alright?

My worry showed no sign of stopping once triggered. After several days of quietly brooding on my own, I finally went to find Lucia in the middle of the night. Luckily, she hadn’t gone to bed yet, and she welcomed me warmly.

“It’s been a while since you’ve come this late.”

“I’m sorry for coming so late.”

“It’s fine, come on in. I was about to make some tea anyway, perfect timing.”

“Thank you.”

We sat at the table together, sipping tea without saying much for a while. I felt a bit anxious, but I didn’t want to refuse the tea she had offered. Lucia had been my savior long before I was a wizard.

“You must have something you want to say, right?”

“I was planning to go somewhere for a bit. I wanted to ask if you could watch over Adella while I’m gone.”

“That’s no problem at all, but where are you going?”

Since I hadn’t left the Magic Tower voluntarily since coming here, it was no surprise that Lucia was curious and a little shocked. I had no reason to hide it.

“I’m planning to visit my first child.”

“…You mean you’re going to visit Duchy Bryant?”

“Yes.”

“Are you sure you’re okay with that?”

“Actually, I’m not planning to go through the main gate. I just want to see the child in secret.”

“Even so, it’s not a place you have good memories of.”

“…True, but after hearing about Adella’s checkup, I’m also worried about Diers, and I can’t just sit still.”

“I understand your feelings perfectly.”

“Thank you… I really can’t express how grateful and sorry I am to you, Tower Master, for everything.”

As I spoke, Lucia carefully took my hand.

“If our roles were reversed, I think you would have given me the same answer.”

“No, I’m not as selfless as the Tower Master. You saw it earlier. If it were for Adella, I should have accepted your kindness without hesitation. Even if I was criticized for lacking shame, I should have put on a brave face for my child.”

The foolish and selfish moment came back to me. It was my own issue, but I hadn’t acted on my own will. Instead of frustration, a deep sense of disgust enveloped me.

“Still, there must be a reason why you want to refuse.”

“…”

Lucia’s words quickly cleared the anxious thoughts in my mind. She always managed to calm my worries with just one simple sentence.

“I can’t know exactly what you’re afraid of or worried about, but… hmm, first of all, you’re a very precious disciple to me. And I don’t throw out my disciples for minor things.”

I could believe her words because she had personally gone to rescue Pedro when he was captured in the palace.

Even though I couldn’t trust myself, I had to make sure to apologize to her.

“I’ll bring Adella over myself. You go straight to the Duchy.”

“…I really, truly appreciate it.”

“How many times do you need to thank me before you’re satisfied?”

“Then… I’ll be going.”

“Good. Your first outing alone, huh?”

As soon as Lucia finished speaking, the scenery in front of me shifted.

It had been years since I had visited, yet it felt as familiar as if I had just been here yesterday. I had unconsciously teleported to the annex and immediately headed for Diers’s room without lingering.

But then I stopped. I saw the green rose garden, just as it was when I left. How much time had passed, and yet it was still in the same state I had left it in?

Even if the annex wasn’t often used, it was possible that guests might come by and see it. Why hadn’t it been tended to? I didn’t even want to look at the space I had stayed in, so I left it, unaware of how it had turned out.

I absentmindedly stared at the garden with confusion, distrust, and a small sense of suspicion before teleporting into Diers’s room. Since it was late, the child was already asleep.

I had worried about whether the nanny would be with him, but to my surprise, Diers was alone in bed. Quietly approaching him, I carefully sat by his bedside to avoid disturbing him.

Seeing how much he had grown since the last time I saw him made my heart swell. Despite growing up without his mother, he had clearly been well-fed and well-cared-for. I felt relieved but also worried that there might be hidden issues, just like with Adella.

It was too late to take him to Olivia, and there was nothing I could do. I couldn’t offer him protection, nor could I pass on my pheromones.

After thinking about it, I gently ran my fingers through his hair. It used to be fine and delicate, but now it has thickened and grown stronger. Just the touch of his hair made my heart ache. I might have been realizing how much time had passed since I last saw Diers.

I had no intention of disturbing his sleep, but as I touched his hair, a strong desire to do more grew inside me. I wanted to touch his cheek, run my fingers through his hair, and gently pat his belly.

As I watched over Diers for a while, suddenly his eyes opened wide. It was as if someone had stolen his sleep away.

“…Mom?”

“Dia…”

When did he learn to speak like that? I had never imagined his voice would sound so beautiful. Even though so much time had passed, I had still subconsciously thought of Diers as a tiny infant.

“Weally, Mom?”

“Yes, it’s me.”

“Wow… Weally? Not dream?”

“…I’m sorry I haven’t visited in so long, Dia.”