I Don't Need the Grand Duke's Regret - Chapter 77
During that time, Ricardo did everything possible to find Armilla. He not only searched the mountains but sent people to every place he could think of.
He contacted the Magic Tower, thinking she might have gone there, and searched every household in Renato, suspecting she might have hidden among the common folk.
However, Armilla was nowhere to be found. Not a single clue emerged.
Other than a blood-stained bracelet, Ricardo had nothing left of her.
Sometimes, it felt like a dream that Armilla had ever been by his side, due to the lack of traces of her presence in the mansion. Other than a few crude dresses, there was no evidence she had been there.
Thus, when anxious, Ricardo would enter the dressing room, clutching Armilla’s dresses which had her scent in it and inhaling deeply. Only then he felt like he could breathe a little.
But there was a limit to that comfort.
The scent on the dresses faded more with each passing day. Despite his efforts to cling to it, the scent dissipated into the air.
As Ricardo walked towards the mountain, his knees sank into the snow. Losing his balance, Ricardo collapsed into the snow.
“Armilla…”
Tears formed in his purple eyes as he gazed at the mountain where Armilla had disappeared. Thick droplets flowed down his sharp jawline.
He was the one who had rejected Armilla. No one else. He was the one who had pushed Armilla away, hurt her, and made her cry.
He felt he had no right to long for her.
But still, Ricardo missed Armilla terribly.
He missed her so terribly that it was unbearable.
What was this emotion? What was it that tormented Ricardo so persistently?
Guilt? Resentment? Obsession?
No, those words were insufficient to describe this excruciating feeling. This painful emotion wasn’t merely that.
‘I love you, Your Grace.’
Sitting in the snowstorm, Ricardo gasped for air as Armilla’s pitiful voice echoed in his ears.
I love you.
I love you, Your Grace.
“Kuhk…”
Ricardo clenched his chest tightly.
It was agonizing. A dreadful pain tormented him, as if someone was slicing his heart with a sword.
Ricardo didn’t understand love. The love he knew was filled with sorrow, anger, and tragedy.
His father locked his mother in his castle out of love, the Emperor spread his seed in her because of love, and in turn, she hanged herself because of her love for the emperor.
To Ricardo, love was repulsive and terrifying.
Yet, strangely, Armilla’s declaration of love was pleasant to him. He cherished the resonance of those words, the desperation and affection they contained.
Ricardo wanted to hear that phrase again from Armilla. If only he could, he would do anything.
“Please, Armilla…”
Ricardo writhed in pain as he searched for Armilla.
“I was wrong. It was all my fault…”
I’ll tell you whatever you want to hear. I’ll give you whatever you want to have. I’ll let you do whatever you want to do. Just please.
“Come back.”
Ricardo’s plea was lost in the wind. His large frame hunched as he began to cry.
* * *
The sound of the strong wind knocking against the window woke Valerio from his sleep. Rubbing his eyes and looking out the window, he saw a dark figure.
‘What’s that?’
Upon closer inspection, Valerio quietly gasped in shock as he recognized the figure.
Ricardo was sitting outside, exposed to the snow.
In this bitterly cold weather, especially at this coldest hour before dawn.
“He’s lost his mind!”
Valerio quickly put on a robe and rushed out of his room. Heading straight for Ricardo, he grabbed his shoulders and shouted.
“Ricardo!”
Valerio frowned. The fierce wind made it almost impossible to open his eyes, yet Ricardo didn’t budge.
Worried he might have gotten frostbite, Valerio shook Ricardo’s body.
“Are you alright? Ricardo, snap out of it!”
“…Leave me.”
It was only when Valerio’s teeth started to chatter that Ricardo finally spoke. He looked at Valerio with a cold gaze and brushed off his hands.
“Don’t interfere.”
“What are you doing here?”
“Waiting.”
“For whom…”
Valerio was about to ask Ricardo when he hesitated. Remembering what Nasir had told him the previous day, he frowned.
“Alright, I understand. But get up. You’ll be in trouble if you stay out here like this.”
Valerio tried to forcefully lift Ricardo, but he remained immovable as if rooted to the ground.
Despite having hardly eaten properly, Ricardo’s resistance was surprisingly strong. Eventually, Valerio gave up, throwing his hands in the air.
“Are you planning to spend the night out here? Do you really think the Grand Duchess will come if you wait here? Do you truly believe that?”
Frustration and impatience drained Valerio’s patience in the cold.
“It’s been a year already! Stop this foolishness! Damn, I’m going to freeze to death!”
“…Valerio.”
Ricardo called him with a grim voice to Valerio’s outcry.
For the first time since Valerio arrived in Renato, Ricardo looked at him properly. The focus returned to his eyes. Ricardo asked Valerio with furrowed brows.
“Why are you here?”
“Driving me insane!”
Valerio kicked the snow-covered ground. Fuming, he then addressed Ricardo.
“So, you notice me now? When will you come to your senses? To think such a man is the Grand Duke of Arcangelo! His Majesty the Emperor would be thrilled to hear this!”
Despite Valerio’s sarcasm, Ricardo showed little reaction.
Valerio looked back at the mansion while shivering. The knights who had noticed the Crown Prince outside, were rushing towards them.
“Let’s go inside for now. Alright, let’s go in and wait.”
Valerio ordered the knights to assist the Grand Duke. It took four strong men to finally move Ricardo.
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